The Brain Freeze Project

If the State of Michigan thinks they can get jihadists to eat the sno-cones, they need to make sure they are goat-flavored. Seriously, read this sitting down, as they really have spent the money and have plans to implement operation sno-cone.

And this is supposed to make us safer.

From The Detroit Free Press December 10 by Dennis Rosenblum

In a world of terror, West Michigan is ready with snow cones

Western Michigan may get more than its share of ice each winter. But sometimes it might not be enough, according to a commission that manages homeland security programs for 13 counties.

The West Michigan Shoreline Regional Development Commission recently bought 13 snow cone machines – one for each county, according to a story in the Daily News of Greenville, which is northeast of Grand Rapids in Montcalm County.

These are Arctic Blast Sno-Cone machines, the report says, at $900 apiece. According to a promotional video on YouTube, they’re made in the U.S. and come complete with plastic drip pan and a dipper spoon. A quick check shows they’re available now on amazon.com and eBay for only $521.

But inquiring minds wonder: How does better snow cone preparedness improve homeland security for west Michigan?

How indeed.

The Daily News report cites a grant program document from May -- which would have been right around the opening of prime snow-cone season – as saying the machines can make ice to prevent heat-related illnesses during emergencies, treat injuries and provide snow cones at promotional events.

David Feldpausch, director of Montcalm County Emergency Services, told the paper he prefers calling the device an “ice shaving machine.”

“I don’t like the term ‘snow cone machine,’ because it sounds horrible,” he said.

There’s no word on whether the residents of those 13 counties are sleeping better at night.